D Day

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“I have the choice of being constantly active and happy or introspectively passive and sad. Or I can go mad by ricocheting in between.”

― Sylvia PlathThe Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath

Wednesday was the big day. D day. D for diagnosis. After years of lying about how I feel I’ve spent some time opening up and jumping through the various NHS hoops, as well as hanging about on their waiting lists, and finally got confirmation (of some sort at least) and some new medication.

4 days in and my head seems clearer already, I’m not sure if this is really the meds or just some crazy placebo effect going on but I’m not going to complain. My attention span is still shot to shit but the fact I have managed for the first time in weeks to sit down and cobble some form of writing together is immense. Part of me wants to steal a car and drive 100 miles an hour into a brick wall. Part of me just wants to go to sleep. This is a new level of calm and normal that I’m not used to.

If most of the people who know me read this they’d probably be surprised and  frankly I feel like an attention whore for writing this drivel but I started this new blog to be honest with anyone reading it and mostly myself. I didn’t intend for it to become a blog about mental illness (shit that’s a bit scary) but I don’t think the odd post about it’s going to hurt… right?

I promise the next post will be about cats!

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About AimesSteele

Mother of the Demonspawn (Dr Who obsessed 3 year old and lover/squasher of snails), wife of Mr Steele (28 year old full-time manchild). Currently studying business and trying to realise my unlikely ambitions of being a domestic goddess and writer.

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