Tag Archives: Demonspawn

Top 3 things the Demonspawn did today to drive me over the edge

Standard

1) Put an earwig in the bath. Whilst I was in the bath.

I don’t have an actual photo of the event, so here’s a little something I made  to help you picture it.

2) Brought me a mystery box…

I genuinely considered throwing this out of the window, fearing that it contained a dead animal.

…full of Shake’n’Vac.

I can’t help feeling this was some kind of comment on my (pretty poor) housekeeping skills. If this is the case I need to make it clear to her that I refuse to be judged by someone whose latest contribution the house was cleaning the patio doors with faeces.

3) Sent a text message to my driving instructor saying “Gla-j.l4-labist” to my driving instructor. And this picture…

Voulez-vous coucher avec moi, ce soir?

I felt like I should send a follow up text explaining that we’re redecorating and that’s why there’s no wallpaper behind the bed and that I do have the wallpaper (it’s on top of the wardrobe) and Mr Steele says he’ll put it on the wall as soon as I finish stripping the wall (which I started over 6 months ago and he knows I’m a starter not a finisher and maybe he should just accept that about me and finish stripping the god damn wall himself?) but I’ve just been a tad busy lately and I’m not in the mood to drag all the furniture away from the wall because I kind of have a bad back at times and I don’t want to hurt myself.

But I’m not sure that would make me look any less crazy.

Well played Demonspawn, until next time…